I have been reading about early pregnancy foods to eat and foods to avoid. J and I are seriously trying to schedule a time to paint the nursery. As I was canning green beans last night, J asked if we should can more than normal this year, since we will be a larger family (of course then she realized that it will pretty much be next summer before anyone can be born). As I read Best When Used By's early pregnancy fears (totally normal) I tried to give myself a stern talk about how to best get through those early days. And as I looked at An Offering of Love's recent baby belly (beautiful!), I could totally imagine myself that pregnant.
So yeah, I think this donor egg cycle is going to work. I am fearful of course. But at some point I realized that I can't take a step forward until I find enough faith to believe the step will work. I am simply not a roll the dice and see what happens person anymore. So I am hanging out with Hope and she is whispering the sweetest things in my ear right now.
Cycle tally:
roughly 2 more weeks of BCP to take.
Z-pak finished- wicked yeast infection initiated (sorry TMI)
Lupron shots begin in T-6 days.
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11 comments:
Lovin the peace that you emanate right now.
D
What a great post. I love that you and Hope are hanging out and that there is canning of beans going on. Keep thinking thoughts of big pregnant bellies on summer days and a lovely nursery. I am in all the way!
Here's hoping for a quick BFP! Great post :)
I loved this post too. Yes, please be optimistic. Please hang out with Hope - she's a great gal. Please believe in your ability to take hold of this baby and bravely walk the line of fear that does not evaporate with a BFP. I don't know how we get through it, there is no handbook or guide. We just take each day as it comes, we have to believe it will work, and we take Hope's hand and say aloud, "It's my turn."
And, if you're me, you have occasional bouts of crying and panic when something seems amiss. Ahem. But then you climb back on the wagon and take the reins again. :)
I had to come read your post again. I needed that sense of calm. Thank you, again, as always, for your kindness and understanding. I'd give you a giant hug if my arms would reach.
hooray for hope. i am imagining you pregnant too :)
wow...only six days until the lupron start?! its going to speed by from here!
It really is going to fly by once these Lupron shots start. I'm so excited for you and glad to hear that you have Hope in your heart. Keep her there!
Great post, indeed. You'd better get that nursery painted soon!
you are the coolest blogger EVER. How do you CAN things??? How do you seal the CAN???? I don't get it.
I need to connect with the earth.
We DO have tomatos and peppers growing in planters on our deck... but I don't even know when I should pick them! How do you know when they are ready????
As for everything else.. I think this is IT. I think you are doing everything right. You seem to be a connected woman... and that helps in the process.
I feel ya girl. I think this is going to work and you and hope should become good good friends. xo
I love this post. There is nothing quite so nice as being on good terms with Hope.
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