2 women trying to make a baby

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Socially engineered attractiveness

We got to speak with *Amy* yesterday and it seems that J and I have a pretty good chance of having a short wait for donor eggs. Why? Because we are not picky! J has light eyes and strawberry blond hair, and I have dark hair and eyes. With this range of features, we could look like a "normal" family with a child of most any hair/eye coloring.

At first I was totally happy thinking about potentially moving up the donor list because other infertiles passed on eggs with the wrong physical features. But then I began to think that maybe I was being too accepting and perhaps J and I should care what our future (hopefully) child will look like. In the end, I decided that I just don't care. If we were adopting, we would not turn down a marginally-attractive child, and goodness knows that either J or I could have spat out an FLK (funny looking kid) from our own loins. What I do know is that the Big Business Fertility Clinic carefully screens egg donors and chooses the healthiest and most attractive (I am trying not to think about the implications there). Last conclusion, I don't think that J or I would have qualified to be egg donors back in our younger days. While no one has ever turned away from us in horror, no one has ever suggested that we should enter beauty pageants either. We may end up with a child that is wildly more attractive than her mothers! How 'bout that?

7 comments:

Danielle said...

Happy to hear there's a break in the case and that dear old "Amy" had some good news to offer.

As for appearance... man it's a crap shoot! Seriously some darn fugly people can make some beautiful children, then the most attractive people pop out the most awkward offspring.

There's no saying what you're going to get and being that you'll love them no matter what... it doesn't matter either.

I'm happy that the good news fairy sprinkled some dust on you today.

D

Meredith said...

Because I'm curious, how much info do you recieve about the donor's personality traits? I think thats what I would be most curious about. When we were picking our sperm donor, we looked more for sense of humor than for physical attributes and I was wondering if you could do that with egg donors.

Anonymous said...

That's great you can move up the list! Your kid is going to be the most beautiful baby you've ever seen no matter who the donors are, I can guarantee it!

tireegal68 said...

great news! I hope those cold buggers give you the prize eggs as soon as possible at a discount!
I am waiting with bated breath. What is the news on embryos?
or maybe I missed that part?
have been off internet and am catching up at work:)
your baby is going to be just wonderful and gorgeous!
At this point I know what you mean - I am like -do the donors / birth parents have limbs, vital organs and a head? okay then let's get this thing moving!
good luck knocking all those others off the list!

Next in Line said...

This is going to be great. There are almost no egg donor programs in Canada. Most people cross the border to do that unless they have a sister that will donate. If it had been a cheaper option, I would have jumped on it. I love this plan! Genes are such a small part of who we are.

Lizzie said...

Just getting caught up (I was out of town for a couple weeks) .... excited to see you moving forward. Thinking of you so much.

Best When Used By said...

Hi Cindyhoo2,
Thank you for visiting my blog! I hope you and J have great luck with the egg donation. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that the National Embryo Donation Center is in your home state (just in case).

I also laughed and wondered how you knew the term "FLK." I was a practicing pediatric nurse for years and that was a term we sometimes used to endearingly describe unusual looks.

As for how pretty - or not - babies turn out to be....well...you never know. Sometimes there are beautiful parents and the kids are...eh. Then sometimes there are so-so looking parents who have gorgeous kids. It's a roll of the DNA dice.

Best of luck to you!