Yesterday I saw the RE for my start-up blood work and ultrasound. The whole thing was non-eventful. Apparently my uterus looks "gorgeous" and my ovaries are looking less PCO-like. Now I wait until CD21 and start my Lupron Injections.
I give HJ her trigger shot tonight then she has her IUI tomorrow. We always worry about timing. IUI too late, IUI too early, follicles too big, not big enough?... the minutiae of it all makes my head swim.
I am still trying to cultivate my inner calm (thanks to An Offering of Love) since I have a new lovely downloaded IVF meditation CD. Truthfully if both HJ and I get pregnant, I will be ecstatic (yet frightened). If only one of us gets pregnant, I would be equally happy (and most likely scared). I do think I have finally overcome my fear that I will over think each portion of a pregnancy. I suppose I feel that since our family has already experienced a m/c, we are due for a healthy pregnancy. Sometimes we simply have to live "as if" all the things we hope and pray for will come true.
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4 comments:
You really do have alot going on and it is normal to be scared. I hope you get your BFP soon and it it's 2 BFP's all the better. Just more love to go around.
Not sometimes... we should ALWAYS live as though the things we pray for will come true. It's just better.
Wishing you the calming clarity, courage and strength to prevail.
D
just discovered your blog... catching up on your path of insanity. jeez this ride is a rough one. nice to be in the blog world with you :) hoping for a positive in your VERY near future.
"gorgeous" is good!! :)
i haven't listened to the cd yet - are you finding it helpful? i'm realy gonna work on that "inner calm" thing in the next few weeks...
good luck to ya'll tomorrow with the IUI! here's to lots of babies!!
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